A STORY.

The other day at the park, I saw a woman walking her dog.  They were walking casually and every once in a while the woman would stop, bend over, pick up a ball and toss it.  Then the woman with the dog started to chat with a friend.  The dog sat quietly at their feet, staring at his ball.  

After a minute he began to whine.  He whined louder and louder until his guardian picked up his ball.  As soon as she had the ball in her hand, he got really, really excited and barked.  She threw the ball anyway and resumed her conversation.  When her dog returned, he dropped the ball at her feet and barked immediately.  This happened 3 or 4 times.  

Eventually the woman tried to reason with her dog.  She bent down with her hands on her hips, looked right into his eyes and yelled, "Frankie, Stop-it!"  To this Frankie replied with an barrage of barks, yelps, yips, and a "Woof!"  The woman, shrugged, looked defeated, waved good-bye to her friend and continued walking her dog and tossing the ball.  

I giggled and thought I bet the next time she even tries to stop and chat her dog will take the shortcut to the most effective behavior... "Pitch a barking fit and mommy stops chatting and does her job!"  In the story above Frankie did what worked.  Barking got him what he wanted.  He will do more of it.

Sometimes we don't give big rewards at all -we "ignore" the bad behavior.  However this only works if you IGNORE the dog COMPLETELY.  This is too hard for most people, they crack and give in like the woman in the story above.  Or, they  unintentionally give hints that they might crack and give into the dog's requests.  

When we bend down, look at, or talk to dogs we are telling them that they might get what they want soon.  We don't do this on purpose.  Its just that 99% of the time, right before we give a dog something they will LOVE, like food, walks, toys, pets, play-time or lap-time, we look right at them and talk to them... "Oh, boy Zip.  Here comes....."   So EYE-CONTACT and WORDS aimed at the dog become predictors of wonderful stuff.  In dog-nerd-speak, we call these Secondary Reinforcers.

When the owner in the story bent down and looked at Frankie to say, "Stop-it"  She might as well have said, "Do you want me to throw your ball?"  Frankie, in that context (she'd already been rewarding his whines with a ball-toss) was anticipating that she would repeat the action.  When dogs think they know what is going to happen, they don't really listen to the words you say.  

If you don't believe me pick up your dog's favorite toy.  Then use your goofiest voice and tell your dog how bad and stupid they have been.  What did your dog do?  Yeah, mine too -just staring at the toy wagging and panting. "Oh, boy, oh boy, she's gonna play squaeky-frisbeeeeee, with meeeee!  Oh, boy, oh boy!"  And I think he's a rather clever dog, but he is a DOG!

So, if poor Frankie wasn't really paying attention to her exact words.  When his owner bent down, looked at him and talked to him (instead of her friend) he got REALLY EXCITED and barked back," YES, YES!  Throw the BALL!"

Apply this to your situation.  If your dog is crying and you get up and try to give him a toy, food, or attention, then you are giving A HUGE REWARD.  If when your dog whines or cries you look at her and talk to her, you are giving a hint that you MIGHT give them something -this is a type of reward.

Regarding the appetite and "SPOILED-DOG" issue.  If the dog is getting a balanced diet and your vet says your dog is in good health, then I don't care if you cook for your dog, or if they never eat food from a bag or can or bowl.  However, if your dog is only eating junk food then the diet is not balanced and your dog will be unhealthy.  To address the issue you will need to: